THE THORNS OF TRUTH.
There’s a question,
One neither you nor I want to answer,
Questions that shake the core of hell
And gives the devil a white robe,
The luckiest escape this question,
While the ones destined to fight don’t.
They always ask me,
Did he hurt you?
I blink, never knowing the exact answer to give,
They ask again,
Did he lay his hands on you?
Quickly, I say ‘no’
I blink again, taken aback by the truth.
He loved me, yet he put mental cages over my mind,
Placed strategically bit by bit,
As he erases friend after friend,
He reassures me he is the best friend I never had,
He pulls the switch on one family member after the other,
What better family can I have?
He doesn’t lay his hands on me; he takes me whenever he wants to,
I learnt defiance only hurts more,
So ‘no’ wasn’t an option,
Compliance protects me,
Isn’t safety the correct answer?
Is this what safety looks like?
He loved me,
Tell me how love exists without kindness,
How love lives in falsehood,
How love calls me ‘love’ only when the devil isn’t home.
Did he hurt me?
Slowly, lines of ‘me’ blurred,
I could no longer tell who I was,
A caged bird with a happy mask,
Who will hear my tunes of hurt,
For I have sung for years,
Hoping my voice reaches the gates of heaven.
I broke free,
Those friends couldn’t protect me
They laid me down like barbecue to be flipped and devoured,
Family sheltered me from the monster,
Allowing me to break into pieces; to pull myself back together,
You never know what losing yourself feels like,
Till you look into the mirror and see someone else all over you,
Wearing your skin like a glove.
You search for fragments of yourself,
You break thousands of times
To take out pieces of someone else,
Until you heal old pieces of yourself and find new pieces,
Only then does freedom call your name.
SAY NO TO ALL FORMS OF ABUSE.
ART BY: CHARLES BOWATER
WRTTEN BY; MARIAM ALAYANDE